B-Dogg Releases pre-inauguration Album Entitled, “Damn it feels good to be the Presdidnt!”
President Elect Barack Obama shocked the American People and thrilled rap music fans everywhere this week by announcing his musical debut album, “Damn it Feels Good to be the Presdidnt!”
He announced the beginning of his musical career at a press conference in the south side of Chicago yesterday. He stepped up to the podium wearing an outfit distinctly different from his usual attire. Instead of suit and tie, he wore a leather jacket over yellow spandex, an outfit with some definite Bling!
“I promised the American people change, and that change is coming!” Obama said. “This nation, by the people, for the people and of the people, is goanna get down with the homies! From now on, ya’ll just call me B-Dogg!”
Phat beats then began to emit from the speakers and subwoofers stationed around the stage and the President-elect began to rap.
Damn it feels good to be the Presdidnt
I’ll feed the poor and help out with their bills
Although I grew up in Jakarta
Now I’m in the US makin’ deals
So voters of the world keep supportin’ me
And I promise to take you very far
The KKK better not upset me
Or I’ll send them white trash bastards to be cleansed in Darfur
To all you Republicans, who thought McCain could win
This nigger’s laughin’, cuz he didn’t!
Now I got the world swingin’ from MY nuts
And damn it feels good to be the Presdidnt!
President-elect Obama, alias B-Dogg then showed off his fancy hip-hop moves, and danced for the roaring crowd of thousands gathered.
Hollis Winslow, 27, of downtown Chicago said, “Funk ya! Put that in yo bowl and smoke it White America!”
“Damn it feels good to be the Presdidnt!” contains killer hits that are sure to be pure gold, such as “Hail to this Black Ass Chief, Mutha Fuka!”, “Time ta do a Drive By on AlQueda!”, “Stick it to the White Man!”, “Get on my Secret Service list Bitches!”, “Jakarta-booty!” as well as the title song.
“I think it says something about our nation that we can all just get down and boogie with our president,” said the very un-hip accountant Rupert McTavish, 47, of Glendale. “He can lead, and he can rap! What a guy!”
In response to this moving press conference/concert, Virgil Griffin, current Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan issued this statement as of 6 a.m. this morning:
“It is apparent to me, given the recent election and the president’s eloquence in song, that my organization, the Ku Klux Klan, has lost touch with the realities of American society. As any rational leader in my position would do, I hereby dissolve my organization completely and channel the sum total of our operational funds into poor inner city charities. I just want to say this to my president, that sir I completely and utterly respect you and your musical artistry and that we, the former members of KKK, will not upset you in any way whatsoever.”
Not everyone is pleased by the current turn of events however. The Rap group Geto Boys and the Rap Artist Snoop Dogg are filing a joint lawsuit for infringement of copyright against the President-Elect.
“As an artist, I am simply outraged to have my image stolen in such a brazen and disrespectful manner,” said Mr. Dogg, who was ironically well spoken and well dressed in a Brooks Brothers’ business suit outside the Cook County Courthouse. “Obama’s so called ‘new hit song’ is obviously a undisguised and sophomoric facsimile of the Geto Boys classic - Damn It Feels Good to Be a Gangsta. The Geto Boys and I intend to prosecute Mr. Obama to the fullest extent of the law.”
When news of the pending lawsuit reached President-elect B-Dogg, he reportedly said, “Snoop, why yo being a player-hater!”
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